What I am Thankful for...

With Thanksgiving in the States upon us tomorrow, it is time to think about what we are thankful for.  I want to start firstly and say that I am thankful for my family.  Those of you that have read my whole blog would notice that my husband and I have been married twice.  Today marks 7 years from our divorce.  It is almost surreal to look back at that day and realize what I have now!  I am thankful that we both had the guts to grow up and realize that we found that person that we were supposed to be with for the rest of our lives when we were 18 and 20.  I am thankful that we both remained open to the idea of giving it another go.  It is so much better this time around!! 

I am thankful that I have 3 healthy children.  I know so many who deal with illness in their family.  Though they deal with it with dignity and strength, I know it must be difficult.  I am also thankful for my health which I have regained control of this year. 

This past weekend, my husband I went to spread the ashes of a really good friend who lost his life unexpectedly earlier this year.  A lot of emotions were involved in that day.  His family chose not to be involved.  I am thankful that my family would have been there without question had it been me. 

Even though it has been a trying week at work, I am thankful that I am able to have a job.  So many don't right now.  My husband has to take a furlough day today, but at least on Monday he has a job to go back to.  The management at my job is toying with our insurance.  I will have to drive 4.5 hours one way to go to my next appointment as I need to get it in before changes happen.  I am thankful that I have that option and ability. 

If I don't make it to post again before Thanksgiving, I wish all of my American friends a grand holiday.  All of my worldly friends, a safe day.  And most importantly, even if it isn't a holiday never forget what you are thankful for in your life.  You never know when it could change.  I love you all and thank you for your support in this journey of my life!

What I eat

I didn't have much extra time yesterday to post this as I meant to.  Thank you Lap Band Gal for suggesting this.  It is so helpful for new ideas.

6:00 am Coffee with 1tbs 2% milk and splenda. (30 cal)

7:00am Protein shake (Pure Protein all naturals vanilla) mixed with hot coffee and a packet of splenda.  If you ever missed Cappuccino, you won't have to again!  (130 cal)

10:00am  Zone bar.  I prefer the Cinnamon Roll or  Kashi Roll peanut carmel (approx. 240 cal)

12:00pm  I am very lucky and live 1 mile from my office so I am able to come home at lunch and have time to cook something.  I usually have a cup of healthy choice soup.  (120)  or 8 cocktail shrimp with cocktail sauce (100), or a grilled chicken tender (70).

5:30 I usually eat whatever the family is having for dinner as I try to cook healthy for them.  Last night we had the thin (breakfast) cuts of pork chops approx 2 oz baked covered with carmelized onions. (approx  185 cal)  2 tbs of mashed potatoes (2 % milk, light butter) (65 cal), 1/2 cup broccoli (27).  My children love all foods so it is easy for us to eat well at home as they will eat anything!  I try to keep calories for dinner under 500 for a normal portion for the family so mine is going to be less than that.



So I end up usually about 800 calories.  That is what I try to keep it at.  I hope this helps!

Whirlwind

This morning has been a complete whirlwind.  I get to work this morning and get a call from our union steward.  She is telling me about a meeting on Monday to discuss what happened at the meeting with the employer yesterday.  Anyway, I can tell that she is pissed off, so I ask her to share.   She knows that I will not say a word to anyone in my office until after the "official" meeting on Monday.  Boy am I glad she shared because it was a real issue for me. 

Our contract expires on November 30.  The jist of the meeting yesterday was that they are changing our insurance (completely), they have already signed contract for said insurance.  We had no idea that this was even being talked about.  AND said new insurance is going to cost us $110 dollars a month more.  My dilema is that I have a secondary insurance through my husband.  I was able to get my band without owning anything.  I however do not want to pay $170 a month for insurance if I don't really have to as I am post op.  Employer is not saying this to anyone, nor have they mentioned to anyone that November is open enrollement.  So they just figure they are going to spring this new insurance on us Dec 1, take first payment $85 out of paycheck on Dec 3.  It won't be open enrollment anymore, so changes can't be made without penalties and you are stuck paying for a year.  I have no problem dropping this insurance as I am covered by husband also, but the problem I have is my next fill appointment is DEC 1!  What timing.  Also, my doctors last day before Dec 1 was yesterday.  So in order to have appointment before insurance changes, I have to drive 4 hours ONE WAY! 

I called my husbands insurance and they said that they can't change to primary until Dec 1.  Pre-authorization has to be made for fill appts as Bariatric Surgeon is not contracted in my region.  Pre-authorization will not be approved as secondary, so I have no choice but to drive for next appointment.  Geez, totally what I want to do right after Thanksgiving!  I was able to get an appointment on Monday November 29.  That will give me 6-8 weeks to set up new appointment and straighten out this mess.  I am just SO GLAD that union steward confided in me!  I couldn't imagine trying to figure all of this out next week with the holiday!

TOM

Before I lost the weight that I have, TOM didn't have that much of an effect on me.  At least that I noticed... I never remember being so in tune with period. Now on the other had, this is ridiculous!  My fingers swell, I eat like a ravenous monster, and my family really realizes something is going on!  My weight loss stalls for a week...  Let's hope I keep the 3lbs I lost for the challenge this week!  After TOM leaves my house though, I usually end up in another decade.  That is is only reason for putting up with this is that loss.  Here's to hoping for the 150's. 

What a difference a year makes!

I posted on Friday with a story of my life over the past year.  As I was going through some pictures, I found a good comparison that I would like to share.

I probably need to email that one to my mom!

Giveaway!

As part of my reading of new to me bloggers, I came across a wonderful blogger Beanne at  Lady Lap Band!  She is giving away a set of Jackie Warner's Power Circuit Training & (1) Set - Hand Weights! Click here to enter!   What a great giveaway!  Back to reading...

Don't forget...

For those of you participating,the second week weigh in for the Holiday Challenge is due today. I went through the working list on Kristen's page and started following all of the challengers that I didn't already follow. It looks like I have a lot of catching up to do! Good luck to everyone. I am off to read some new blogs now!

Wow has it been that long!?

I guess that it has been a bit since I have been around.  Life has gotten in the way, I guess.  That being said, life is good!  Today is my daughters 2nd birthday.  I feel like this day is really the beginning of this lap band journey.  I had a lot of complications throughout my last pregnancy.  She ended up being born at 35.5 weeks due to pre-eclampsia.  (I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy!)  I had lost out big on the diet battle right before getting pregnant and had gained 15lbs the two months prior to getting pregnant.  Pregnancy didn't help much and I really watched my weight during my pregnancy.  I cried and cried the day that scale had to be moved to 200.  (I'm 5'2")  On the day before she was born, I weighed 210.  I had gestational diabetes.  I was taking at least 3 insulin shots a day.  The doctors promised me that the diabetes would go away.  Hailey was born healthy and 6lbs 1oz.  For my 6 week checkup, I got on the scale still weighing 210 WTF!?  I have a baby right here, how in the h*ll do I still weigh 210!?  My diabetes had not resolved itself.  Neither had my blood pressure.  What was I to do? I was devastated once again.  I went to my PCP and was put on several medications.  I was 33 years old.  I had to pick up the grandma bag at the pharmacy each month.  It was horrible.

After my daughter's first birthday, I still weighed 208.  I had reserved myself that I was going to stay fat.  I wasn't happy about it, but my body was fighting every attempt at losing this weight.  I felt horrible all of the time.  I had no energy, and I couldn't get on the floor to play with my little girl.  If I got down there, there was no chance of getting up again. 

In January of this year, I really started looking into the lap band.  I checked on my insurance and it was a covered benefit.  I never would have been able to afford otherwise.  I started my diet requirement for my insurance.  The first month I lost 2lbs.  Second month 2lbs.  Geez I was getting frustrated!   I was so glad that my insurance diet was only 3 months as I would have probably given up if it had been 6. 

I got my surgery date set up for June 9.  It was right after my birthday.  I was excited and scared all at the same time.  I have been having so much trouble losing weight, would it still be that way? 

Fast forward 5 months.  I am flirting with 50 lbs lost.  I am so close.  I would have never thought at Hailey's last birthday that I would be where I am today.  I am able to move.  I am able to chase her if I need to.  I feel wonderful.  I still have 35 lbs to go.  The glory in that is that I know that I will get there.  The uncertainty is no longer lurking.  I also have been able to be in pictures with  my family.  That is a great feeling.

Thank you for sticking with me through my story.  I credit each and every one of you with helping me through my weight loss.  The statistics say that those who attend support groups and such lose more weight than those who don't.  As I am 3.5 hours from my surgeon's office and there aren't any closer support groups for me to attend, you gals are my support group. 

Holiday Challenge

For everyone who has joined the Holiday Challenge, don't forget to send your scale shot to Kristen today! I am definately ready to get back into my exercising. I can't pass up a challenge. My goal is 12lbs during the challenge. 

This week has been a whirlwind. Work has been slow, I have been sick. I would thank all for the great pick me ups when I was really down. I had intense vertigo that day. It was the weirdest thing. 

I hope that everyone is starting to gear up for the holidays!  I am thinking that this one is going to be fabulous!  We are planning on having a nice home holiday this year.  In years past we have travelled to different places for holiday celebrations.  My husband's Christmas gift from his employer was 4 furlough days.  They promised as this was being discussed in previous months that they would spread them out as to not cause hardships.  Well what it has came down to is hitting 3 out of 4 paychecks during the holidays because they are telling us what days that they have to take.  This sucks ass.  How is that not supposed to cause hardships? 

My question now on this whole furlough thing is whether daycare is going to close for a "paid holiday" on those dates.  Our daycare works on the schedule of the university.  If the university is closed to staff then they are closed, but full payment is due.  It will be a big double whammy if we have to pay for daycare on a not getting paid day even if she isn't there.  Currently my daycare costs twice the amount of my house payment every month!  Kindergarten can't come fast enough for me!

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my band?  I really am enjoying this process.  I feel better than I have in years.  I have hope.  That is something that had been lacking in previous years.  I think that is why I am really looking forward to the holiday season this year.  I am not worried about all of the food that will be around, as even if I eat everything I want, I won't be able to eat enough to impede my process.  That is a wonderful feeling!  I definately won't be able to eat 3 of the sam's club packages of baklava this year.  Thank god! 

I hate using sick days to actually be sick!

I don't know about anyone else, but it really seems like the waste of a perfectly good sick day when you are actually sick. I woke up in the middle of the night with flu-like symptoms. As I was sitting in the bathroom this morning, I felt as if I needed to throw up. I heaved for a while (I know TMI), but nothing more than spit came up. I am was worried the whole time as to whether an actual vomit would come up through my band. How does that work? Does it make a super projectile or something? Could I slip my band? Too much to worry about. I must have looked like total hell today as my husband said, "I hope that you aren't going to work today, stay home sick." So here I am, home, sick.

I hope that I feel better later, but right now it isn't looking good. I totally hope that I feel better this weekend. My husband and the boys are going on a boy scout campout. My daughter and I are going to spend her last weekend as a one year old having a total girls weekend. Pedicures and hair curlers and all! She loves to have her toes done! I can't believe that she will be two next week!

I fixed my page!

Ok so I am a complete retard! I had a bunch of returns entered after my ticker. Not sure how they got there, but I was able to get rid of them. Crisis averted!

Men!

Well my husband usually isn't too much of a pain in the rear, but there are days that I really wonder what their purpose is on this earth.  I talked in my last post about the laptop going down.  We had taken the desktop away from the kids, so until I hooked that back up, I was on the Wii for internet.  Anyway, the desktop is all hooked back up, but that isn't good enough for him.  He calls me today and wants me to take off work early so that we can go laptop shopping.  Not that we really need one right now, and not that we are a bit short on money right now, and not that Christmas isn't just around the corner.  MEN!  Geez!  His excuse was, "I don't need to spend all that time in the basement."  Now mind you our basement is just as nice as the rest of the house.  He just wanted an excuse.  Well he got his laptop, but I won't touch it until he gets it all set up the way that he wants it.  I guess that I can use it against him later when I want something.  I just needed to vent!

Bandwise, the week is going well.  I am still flirting with that new low.  Hopefully it will stick soon.  I am having female issues right now.  ie the period that seems like it will never end!  3 weeks off and on at this point.  I HATE my Mirena!!!!!  I was able to stay away from the Halloween candy.  I had one fun size butterfinger.  I didn't think that was too bad!  I really haven't wanted anything else.  I love my band.

I am getting excited for the new Holiday Challenge!  Hopefully, I will be able to post more when the laptop is up and running.  It is really hard to find time to get down here.  My daughter is currently standing at the gate at the top of the stair yelling MAMA! MAMA! 


Does anyone know how to fix the top of my blog?  All of this space just appeared the other day and I can't for the life of me figure out what the h*ll happened.   I didn't change anything, it just appeared.  Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am an html retard!